How [Guys] survive a break up

A couple issues back, Mary Kate Kwansik wrote about girls and how they can move on from a big break up. I read it and thought of one thing: What about the guys?

Let's first disregard the common misconception: it's not always our fault if a relationship turns sour. Sometimes guys don't even see a break up coming and then they hear "I need a break" or "I just don't love you anymore".

Ouch. You spent a lot of time and money on her and now she just falls out of love with you. That's a big blow to a guy's psyche.

So now you're stuck by yourself, picking up the pieces of your heart that girl just shattered. So guys, what's the next step? Where do we go from here?

Well after talking to some girls and going off of some of my own and friends' experiences I have come to a conclusion that there are three possible options here: Get over it, get back to it, and get even.

1. Get over it

Surely you're going to be depressed from this. Who wouldn't be? If you weren't, your heart is colder than Scrooge's on Christmas. Make a call to one of your boys and meet up with the crew. Yes, the same crew that said she isn't worth your time. While they'll give you crap and say "I told you so," they'll get you out of that depressed mood in no time.

They'll surely find another girl for you to meet and make you forget about what's-her-name before you know it.

The ex might realize she made a huge mistake though. She sees you and talks about reconciling. She just put you through a funk that's worse that David Ortiz going 3-for-43 and she wants you just to take her back?

Just tell her, "sorry, let's just be friends" and move on. Be mature about it, as much as you want to act like a complete asshole to her, you have the upper hand here so take the high road. Besides, you don't want to be added and dropped the same way you add and drop pitchers in your fantasy baseball league.

2. Get back to it

You loved her and you'll be patient for she'll come back. Or you hope so. You're not leaving your apartment and you're watching movies like "The Notebook." You look like you're the main character in "Forgetting Sarah Marshall." For God's sake she's not going to want to take you back if she's sees you like a wreck. Just give it time and live you're normal life. Talk to her every now and then just to see how she's doing. Then see if she's willing to reconcile. Hopefully she say's yes, if not refer to #1 or #3 depending on if you want to be mature or not. Also realize if you take this route, your boys won't look at you the same way again.

3. Get even

This girl doesn't realize what the hell she just did by dropping you like a bad habit. Make her suffer the way you are. You could just shout at her and just drop every piece of dirt you have on her and throw it in her face. You know what makes her tick, so get her angry and depressed.

Flirt with her friends, possibly hook up with one. Be as reckless as you want. Also it seems like in almost every relationship, there's that one (or more) female friend(s) you have that you're ex didn't like. Talk to them too. Go on a friendly date with her and take a picture and put it up on Facebook. It'll get her upset no matter what she says. She'll call you immature but being mature stopped when you got dumped.

Choosing to do this may lead to restraining orders, arrests, or confrontations with ex's dads, brothers, uncles, or all of them. So realize what you're getting into before you act in such a way.