You'd Probably Be Eaten During World War Z

Ok, kids. Have a seat. I'm gonna tell you a little history lesson about The Zombie War. Why yes Amy, I did have to put what was your grandmother down during that time but that's not what I'm here to talk about. I'm not sure what they're teaching you kids in school these days, but considering humanity was almost driven to extinction, I'm pretty sure they devote at least a class or two to it. Anyway, what I've got here is an oral history of World War Z as written by a United Nations agent by the name of Max Brooks that will give you the full story.

Sure, we had heard some of the story: Israel's isolation, the disaster at the Three Gorges Dam, the military debacle at Yonkers and the nuclear exchange between India and Pakistan, which I'd never thought I'd see in my life, but then again I'd never thought I'd seen an undead corpse try and gnaw my arm off and that happened too much for my liking. What we didn't quite grasp at the time was the scope of what was happening. Hell, we were all taking a placebo for a fake disease called "African Rabies", what did we know? We didn't know about the decimation of the Russian army by its own forces, the Chinese commander who stole a sub to save the lives of his sailors and their families, the downed pilot who survived on her wits in the Louisiana bayou or the fact there was still a crew in the International Space Station and they were witnessing the whole damn thing.

What Brooks does is show how the battle against Zach was something everyone was involved in. We were no longer nations; we were a species that was being pushed to the edge of existence and this was our struggle. What's that? Oh, Zach is the term the military used for our "adversaries". World War Two had "Gerry", Viet Nam has "Charlie", and we had "Zach". No one liked calling the damn things zombies so we gave them a human name. I mean, they were still biologically human, kind of, but I guess it took some of the horror out of the situation. And believe me, there was plenty of that to go around.

I wonder how many of those things actually had the name Zach on their birth certificate.

Anyways

Brooks has compiled the history of "The Dark Times" by the numerous interviews he conducted. He originally had the findings put in a U.N. report, but that was just a report; he took what was left over and made this historical record of sorts that had the human element to it. This book spans every continent, from the beginnings with "patient zero", to humanities darkest hours and back. It'll explain how Cuba went from a banana republic to the world's economic superpower and why nobody can go to Iceland or the beach just yet, and it does so elegantly and a little too realistic for comfort. Now go wash up, dinner is almost ready.

(Author's note: For those confused by the review, go buy this book. It's amazing and transcends the zombie novel into a sweeping social and political commentary you won't find in almost anything else and if you do, it will most likely sacrifice what charm and emotion this book possesses. I bet you didn't a zombie novel could be so thought provoking and heartfelt, huh?)