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SAVW: McDonalds "Hiring Day"

Published: Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Updated: Wednesday, April 20, 2011 20:04

McDonalds

The Suffolk Voice

Wouldn't you love to work for this man?

On April 19th, McDonalds hired up to 50,000 new employees for what they called "National Hiring Day", or what sane people would probably call "The Most Obvious and Inane Publicity Stunt Known to Mankind".

McDonalds is claiming that "National Hiring Day" is going to help fight the use of the term "McJob" to describe low paying "dead-end" work. So to do this they're going to hire anyone who walks into a McDonalds, or anyone who is standing outside of a McDonalds, or anyone who is within one mile of a McDonalds. This will obviously promote how working at McDonalds is a great way to jump start your career by working minimum wage at a fast food restaurant. Great plan McDonalds, your employees are clearly going places! Now I'm not saying that working in a fast food restaurant is a waste of time and you should either work at a real restaurant or give retail a try. Well, I guess I am saying that. I realize that many teenagers view McJobs as a good first job, something to prepare them for better occupations in the future. What I would like to know is how anyone could think that having "worked at McDonalds" on their resume could possibly help them in any way later on in life?

Regardless of that, McDonalds is trying to show that there is "career growth" and "possibilities" within a "McJob" career…hahaha, that's a good one. Despite their claims that multiple McDonalds CEO's got their start by flipping burgers, the chances of that happening to every McDonalds employee are…well I'm no mathematician, but even I can tell that that is next to impossible. There is no way that someone could make a decent living working part-to-full time at a fast food restaurant, never mind working their way to the top of the Ronald-McDonald-food-chain, whoops, I mean the McDonalds fast food empire.

Mickey Dee's is really trying to promote a new image to attract new employees, as clearly demonstrated in this excerpt from their website: "We believe the best people in the world work right here. And we believe you could be one of them. You've got enthusiasm, responsibility and drive. We've got flexible schedules, benefits and jobs that can turn into satisfying careers. It's a perfect match." By "you've got enthusiasm, responsibility and drive" they mean that you probably got laid off of your real job, and no one else is hiring, but we are! By "flexible schedules" they mean that you will be working the midnight shift five days in a row without being compensated for overtime! By "satisfying career" they mean you will spend the rest of your life flipping burgers, yelling at lazy teenaged employees, and smelling like french fries and grease! Sounds like a perfect match indeed…

So if you're looking for a job, go down to the nearest McDonalds now! By the way what's the date today? Ba da ba ba ba, I'm lovin' it!

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